How does it work for a family to be serving God versus a single person serving God?
A family is, in fact, a bunch of single people (except for one married couple in there), and so a big part of how a family serves God is involved with what each person is doing individually.
Thus, as a family, the father needs to do what God has called him to do (providing for his family, loving his wife, raising godly children in a godly manner, working in and with the church in the way God's called him to do), the mother would need to do what God has given her to do (raising godly children in a godly way, doing what needs to be done in running the household, loving her husband, and ministering to others as she has been called or as may be needed), the kids' main job in serving God has to do with being obedient, diligent in school – learning what it means to be godly adults, and practicing that in appropriate ways.
But serving God as a family means more than that. If that was all it was, then marriage and family really wouldn't be much of anything special. As a family, there is a unity (or there
should be) that should stand as something special.
In the “perfect” marriage relationship, the husband and wife love each other unselfishly and consistently look for the other’s good before his or her own. Both are understanding, supportive, and communicative; they honestly want the best possible for each other, and are willing to sacrifice for that.
However, in the godly marriage relationship, the husband and wife love God first and foremost and work together towards the goal that God has for them, towards fulfilling his will. They are not focused inwards, towards each other, but outwards – their focus is on God and serving him, a common goal shared by both partners. Since they love God, they will also love each other in the manner of the “perfect” marriage relationship, but that will not be the main focus – the main focus is God and God alone, and the qualities of the “perfect” marriage relationship are simply the natural result of serving God first.
This is in fact the underlying principle not just for a married couple but for the entire family – they are all focused on an “outside” goal. The family relationship is built around the fact that each of the family is loyal first to God, and then, because of that, to the family.
The family as a whole should work together to serve God, so that it isn't, “Oh, Mrs. Christian is such a godly woman, especially with everyone doing everything they do in her family,” but rather “That Christian family is weird – it's like they all have the same goal or something.”
One of the main ways of serving God as a family has to do with the fact that every aspect of a family’s life should be an example of godliness to friends, acquaintances, and neighbours; like it says in Timothy about having well-behaved children (not accused of being riotous or unruly), and that the husband and wife ought to have the kind of relationship that people look at and admire because of its love and virtue.
The other major part of serving God as a family (maybe more as parents) has to do with raising children who truly know what godliness is (even if they choose to turn away from God). One of the things that stands out when reading through Kings and Chronicles are the little notes “and so and so walked in the ways of his father so and so, to work evil...” Or like the sons of Rechab, who had vowed not to touch wine or strong drink because of their Dad. Each of those things shows that the children’s actions reflect on the family, either in a good way or a bad way. For that reason, it's really important how children are raised (because they are, after all, a major “product” of marriage), and that even if the children decide to turn away from God, it's important that their only significant complaint should be along the lines of “Mom and Dad were just too much into Jesus -- that was all they ever talked about -- and I couldn't handle it” rather than about how “Mom and Dad were unfair, mean, and touchy” or any other complaint that might have validity.
In terms of what the family should be doing to serve God...
Generally speaking, the father’s/husband’s calling should provide the major direction for the family. So if the father is called to work in evangelism, the family would end up serving roles within that realm, not necessarily all doing what the father does, but serving in whatever areas may fit alongside his vocation.
It's one thing to say that a husband and wife should love God and work together to serve Him, but how exactly does that work in practice?
A lot of that comes around to listening – What does God want us to do? – and then doing it. It's hard to say very specifically something like “Well, this family should be cooking for the soup kitchen, helping out at Serenity House, leading Bible studies, helping out little old lady neighbors” because that is dependent on what God tells the couple to do – they might, but really what they specifically do to serve God is dependent on what he tells them to do.
Serving God as a family involves whatever is given in the Bible (pure, undefiled religion, etc.) and then furthermore, doing whatever else God has asked apart from the Scripture (being led by the Spirit to do such and such) – but what differentiates it from an individual serving God is that unity, that common goal, because it truly isn't a single person doing it – the whole family does it together – and it's more than “Well, Mom and Dad said we're going to go and do this as a family, so we have to do it,” but it really is a common value between each member of the family.
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Thanks to the friend who helped write this.
